For Women with ADHD ADD Who Want to Connect
Do I Belong Here??? Warning - LONG
Hello Ladies,
My name is Laura, I'm 40 years old, a nurse and a mom of one. I don't ever remember having trouble in school although I never did my homework til the last minute, and relationships were difficult for me (I just thought I was weird). As I said, school work was not a problem, just getting homework done. I didn't have a problem staying in my seat, but while in my seat I couldn't (and still can't) sit still. And I can take multiple choice tests with my eyes closed, but please don't give me an essay test. I think it's why nursing school went so well for me, because I can take those kind of tests.
My older sister, younger brother, and mother have ad/hd. No one ever MENTIONED it in relation to me and it never even crossed my mind until very recently. I do have a history of extremely impulsive behaviour that has unfortunately adversely affected my son.
The problems that have come forward just recently are not new issues for me but they have never been as big a deal as they are now. I have been a hospice nurse for a little over a year. My deficiencies have become glaring to me in the last several months. In the last year I've lost my car keys THREE TIMES, I literally can't remember from minute to minute, I can't get my paperwork completed and in when it's supposed to be, I always forget to call my patients when I say I'm going to and my follow up has been terrible, I am messy and disorganized. And follow up is SO important to what I do, patients and families HAVE to trust that I am going to take care of them. I love what I do, I love my patients and their families, and I know it's what I'm supposed to be doing at this time. And it has become obvious to me that I have to get my act together or I'm going to lose my job. Working in a hospital is easier for my organization because you do, you chart, you go home. This job requires ongoing paperwork, follow up, etc. It's really shined a light on my (lack of) skills.
So, last week when I could tell that I had pissed my boss off royally because I am way behind on some things, I panicked and called my doc. Before I went to her, I took some online ADD tests and passed them all with flying colors! However, when I saw my doc, she said it COULD be be ADD, but it could also be other things like anxiety, stress, premenopause, depression, etc. But she did put me on concerta and referred me to a neuropsycologist for testing. That was last Tuesday. Friday I saw my therapist and he said that if I was ADD the concerta would work immediately. I don't have any idea if it's working. The first couple of days I feel a little hyper at first, but I took it this morning and didn't feel anything. As for improving memory and performance, is it the concerta or the fact that I am TRYING to pay a little bit more attention and writing stuff down. (all of one day)
I feel like I have so much in common with so much of what I've read and would be so relieved to find out that I might not be lazy and dumb. My family just kind of laughs at me, oh I'm so goofy and silly, and I laugh with them, but it's really not funny to me at all. Makes me feel like I'm losing my mind!
Anyway, pending official testing, this is what I'm going with. So I'm wondering about concerta. The insert said it could take two weeks to work, but when my therapist said it would work immediately I became concerned. I started on 36mg of concerta. Can I go up? Or if it doesn't work immediately should I try something else or just forget it all together?
I am so sorry this ended up so long. I must have had more to say then I realized!
Thanks for listening,
Laura
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by jen on -
There are other things they can try and some of them work for some people and not for others. I don't know a lot about Concerta. I am on Ritalin now and I am hoping to maybe try Adderall just because I have some undesireable side effects from the Ritalin. I can't really say about the ADD. I would highly suggest reading "You mean I'm not lazy, stupid or crazy" because that book sealed the deal for me. I saw myself over and over again!! And as for the school stuff, I was basically a straight A student because school was just my "thing" didn't matter if it was multiple choice or essay I would ace it. So, even though some people do poorly in school that is not a "rule" really. People like us who do well are the ones who get overlooked and spend our entire lives feeling like crappy people because we can't clean, do laundry, we lose our keys (check out the thread on those of us who have lost our CARS), can't seem to have normal conversations half the time. Bark at our kids when they break our focus..... (well, I guess I shouldn't say "Our" because everyone is different, but these are a lot of my problems anyway.) I will give you the advice everyone has given me... if you don't feel like it is working tell your doctor. They can try other stuff.
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Permalink Reply by Cami on -
Hi Laura!
Nice to meet you! I'm new here as well. What attracted me to this site was, after reading some posts, how "normal" it made me feel. The issues I struggle with daily (of which I go to great lengths to hide from the world at large) are not mine alone. Though I haven't been here long I feel I have been able to take steps to live with, rather than continually fight with, ADHD.
I feel if you find anything to gain, that you belong. ~~Cami
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Permalink Reply by Cami on
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Oh.. and a PS.... I may reply more than once to a single post... mainly due to my having to absorb things in bits and pieces. ~~~Cami
Cami said:Hi Laura!
Nice to meet you! I'm new here as well. What attracted me to this site was, after reading some posts, how "normal" it made me feel. The issues I struggle with daily (of which I go to great lengths to hide from the world at large) are not mine alone. Though I haven't been here long I feel I have been able to take steps to live with, rather than continually fight with, ADHD.
I feel if you find anything to gain, that you belong. ~~Cami
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Permalink Reply by Nancy on
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Your story could be my story. The only difference is that I have been on medication for nearly 20 years and I am slightly older. I, too, am a medical professional so I understood your angst about the efficacy of the medication, the speed in which it works, etc. I know that when I first began medication, it took a while (a week or so??) for the medication to take effect and nearly 6 months before my doctor and I came up with a good dosing regimen for me. One of the things that I did was to read up on my medications in the PDR and worked in concert with my doc to determine my medications, schedule, etc. Only you know what you daily life entails and the key periods of the day needed for output and the other demands that play into your life.
Hang in there.
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