Women With ADHD ADD

For Women with ADHD ADD Who Want to Connect

I know, I'm fortunate that I don't have to get up for a job anymore; I'm on disability. So my apologies to those who do for even complaining about this.

I'm trying to deal with all the ADD & stress though and sleep issues - which fluctuate. Sometimes better, sometimes worse. I have apnea, mild, and I choose for now to treat it by not sleeping on my back (I've trained myself to sleep on my side).

But I have a devil of a time awakening in the mornings, and it helps so much with my cognitive and mood state if I can just let myself wake up when MY BODY and MY MIND are ready.

I get so mad when some friends call if it's not important. For instance, one friend's been awaiting the birth of a grandchild, which happened today. I would've been happy to get that call. But others just want to jabber about what happened at their job or that thier new cell phone isn't what they had hoped it would be. THAT CAN WAIT!

I feel like a selfish pig saying all this. But once my returning to the world of the living in the morning has been ruined, often it throws me off for the whole day. And I have to fight the urge to be really p/o'd about that. With varying degrees of success. I even told Chatty Cathy this morning that I didn't have much time to talk and asked what was up, hoping she'd get the tone that it ought to be worthy of serious conversation and that I had a lot to do today. But she's one of those bright-and-early types who can't comprehend that others might not be.

So, I know you're going to say, just tell these people when it's too early to call. Would that it were that simple.

If I were a mom, and these were my children, I'd invoke that "If there's no bleeding or broken bones, and nothing's on fire, DON'T BOTHER ME until (time)" rule!

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I'm not sure if this is the right answer for you, or not, but turn off the phone, let it go to voice mail, and you can call them back when it's convienient for you. I hate talking on the phone. I hate being caught off guard. I let most of my calls go to voice mail, and when I'm ready to talk, I'll call back. And I'd much rather text too. People have a better chance of getting a reply back if they text me.

 

My 2 cents:)

Well, you're going to have to invoke the courage to tell them not to call you. Or, you could just turn your phone off for some time. For example, I have mine turned off when I sleep. If you have a landline, do away with it and get a cell so you can easily switch between on and off. :)

I understand where you're coming from. I can get quite pissy if I'm interrupted by people for stuff that doesn't matter - I interrupt myself enough already, I don't need them to do it too!

For the most part, I've been able to train my family to ask "is now a good time to chat?" when they call. It has helped immensely. Another thing that has helped is buying a new home phone - it has a "quiet time" feature, which lets me set a specific time period (midnight to 9 or 10am for me), where the phone will not ring audibly. It has been a great help in letting me get my stuff together before the daily banalities start.

Yeah, I'm thinking I may just turn off the ringers. Trouble is, I hate to not be available because some family and friends do occasionally have an emergency or at least a genuine urgency, for which I'm glad to help out. It's just the ones who, like you say, don't ask "Did I wake you?" or "Is this a good time - you can call me back later if it isn't" etc. that drive me nuts.

HoppingBunny... I then agree with Tabby's idea. "Train" your family. Hah, that sounds so weird to type or say.

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